Etiquette and Procedures for Visiting a Grave

Visiting graves is a tradition many people observe during the holy month of Ramadan or Eid al-Fitr. In fact, grave visits can be made at any time.

Although it has become a common habit, the ruling on visiting graves is actually sunnah. So, what are the proper procedures for visiting graves in Islam? Read on to find out more!

What Is a Grave Visit?

In Islam, visiting graves is one of the means by which a Muslim keeps their faith strong and remembers mortality. Visiting graves is a sunnah that is strongly recommended in Islam, especially visiting the graves of one's own parents.

The purpose of re-establishing the practice of grave visits is to remind visitors that life in this world is not everlasting. It also reminds visitors of the Hereafter.

In the early days, the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ actually forbade his companions from visiting graves, before the practice was made lawful. This was because at that time many Muslims still misunderstood the meaning of grave visits. As the Prophet ﷺ said:

قَالَ رَسُولُ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَدْ كُنْتُ نَهَيْتُكُمْ عَنْ زِيَارَةِ الْقُبُورِ فَقَدْ أُذِنَ لِمُحَمَّدٍ فِي زِيَارَةِ قَبْرِ أُمِّهِ فَزُورُوهَا فَإِنَّهَا تُذَكِّرُ الْآخِرَةَ

Meaning: “I had previously forbidden you from visiting graves. Now, visit them, for they remind you of the Hereafter and increase your good deeds.” (HR. Muslim)

Procedures and Etiquette for Grave Visits

When visiting a grave, there are etiquettes that you should observe and others that you should avoid. One etiquette in visiting graves according to Islam is to pray for the person buried before your eyes. To better understand the proper way to visit, consider the following explanations:

1. Perform Wudu Before Visiting the Grave

The first procedure you should follow when visiting a grave is to perform wudu beforehand. The purpose is to perfect and purify your intention in carrying out the grave visit.

2. Greet the Dead

The next etiquette to observe when visiting a grave is to offer a greeting. Visitors are encouraged to greet the inhabitants of Muslim graves. You can offer the greeting while facing the grave. Then say:

السَّلَامُ عَلَيْكُمْ أَهْلَ الدِّيَارِ مِنْ الْمُؤْمِنِينَ وَالْمُسْلِمِينَ وَإِنَّا إِنْ شَاءَ اللَّهُ بِكُمْ لَاحِقُونَ أَسْأَلُ اللَّهَ لَنَا وَلَكُمْ الْعَافِيَة

Meaning: “Peace be upon you, inhabitants of this place, among the believers and the Muslims. If Allah wills, we will follow you. I ask Allah for well-being for us and for you.” (HR. Muslim).

3. Do Not Wear Sandals

When visiting, it is best not to wear sandals. This is a sunnah etiquette for grave visits. The purpose of going without footwear is to show respect to those buried. This is also found in a hadith:

يَا صَاحِبَ السِّبْتِيَّتَيْنِ، أَلْقِ سِبْتِيَّتَكَ! فَنَظَرَ الرَّجُلُ فَلَمَّا عَرَفَ رَسُوْلَ اللهِ، خَلَعَهُمَا فَرَمَى بِهِمَا

Meaning: “O you wearing sandals, woe to you! Take off your sandals!” The man looked up, and when he recognized the Messenger of Allah, he removed them and threw them away.” (HR. Abu Dawud).

However, there are some circumstances in which you may wear footwear when visiting a grave, for example, when the ground is hot and wet.

4. Face the Qibla When Praying

The next procedure for visiting a grave is to face the qibla when praying and making dhikr for the deceased.

Reciting tasbih, takbir, and tahmid is also highly encouraged in Islam during grave visits. This aims to complete your prayers for the person you are remembering during the visit.

5. Do Not Sit or Walk on the Grave

Another etiquette to observe during a grave visit is not to sit or stand on the grave itself. You should only walk beside or between the graves. As narrated in the hadith recorded by Muslim:

لأنْ يَجْلِسَ أحَدُكُمْ عَلَى جَمْرَةٍ، فَتُحْرِقَ ثِيَابَهُ فَتَخْلُصَ إِلَى جِلْدِهِ خَيْرٌ لَهُ مِنْ أنْ يَجْلِسَ عَلَى قَبْرٍ

Meaning: “If one of you were to sit on a burning ember, which burns his clothes and reaches his skin, it would be better for him than sitting on a grave.” (HR. Muslim).

6. Pouring Water on the Grave

Pouring water over a grave during a visit is not a sunnah, but it is permissible. This is based on a hadith which states:

أن النبي ( صلى الله عليه وسلم ) رش على قبر ابراهيم ابنه ووضع عليه حصباء

Meaning: “The Prophet ﷺ sprinkled water on the grave of his son Ibrahim and placed pebbles upon it.” (HR. Abu Dawud).

7. Send Prayers for the Deceased

The final procedure for visiting a grave is to send prayers to the deceased. You may then recite tasbih, takbir, tahmid, dhikr, and special prayers for the deceased. After reciting these prayers, you may conclude with Surah Al-Fatihah.

Now Do You Understand the Procedures for Visiting a Grave?

These are the things you need to know when you are going to visit a grave or are in the middle of a visit. Of course, these grave visit etiquettes are in line with Islamic law and the sunnah of the Prophet ﷺ.

May the grave visit you make be counted as a good deed, both for you and for the family members who have passed away.

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